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Speaking JellyKat

Goddess Star Kassi Martin Transformative Coach
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Once Upon A Time…  I raised a boy I didn't give birth to.

This was not an easy situation... and a LOT went on over the years as you might imagine...

When he was around 6 he began collecting Jelly Kat toys - Rabbits mostly... soft, cuddly, beautiful... We used to go a shop in St Andrews called Bonkers who sold them and he would get one each visit.

For many years, his Jelly Kat Rabbits came in very handy ....because he did not say very much at all.  In fact, initially he did not speak... 

He played a lot.

Through time, he would bring his Jelly Kat Rabbits to my Sand Tray.  He would come to my office and say "my rabbits need therapy Kas..."

He sometimes sat them on the client's chair together and he would explain - through the rabbits - what was going on… 

It could be something simple like: "THEY fell out today at school… and HE doesn't care that this rabbit is upset!" or much worse... "He's sad and doesn't know why his dad won't visit him...".  

Heart wrenching moments...

And so together we would work it through with the Jelly Kats.  I didn't teach him to do this, he instinctively knew… children are so wise.

I remember taking him to Hamleys toy store in London when he was around 9 years old and we walked in and on the right were rows and rows and rows of Jelly Kat Rabbits and he laughed and laughed.  He'd never seen so many Jelly Kats together!

When he was a teen and had one or two big struggles going on… he once left a Jelly Kat clinging on to my bedroom door handle (paws tied on the handle)…  I instantly knew there was something BIG going on, which opened up a conversation.

THEN!!!

A few months ago, he was having a massive decluttering session of his bedroom having met his new love.   He brought all his Jelly Kat Rabbits to me.  He told me he wanted me to have them all for my Therapy room as he didn't need them any more.

Quite an emotional moment… 

I hugged them all tightly and told him I would treasure them and keep them very safe.  

I cried at this milestone moment as you might imagine...

Then, he recently passed his driving test… He took his girlfriend out to the seaside for the day. They weren't home by the time I went to bed.  I had been nervously watching the clock and determinedly NOT texting to check all was ok... 

Then I decided to put my trust in him (well, in the Jelly Kat rabbits) and sat five of the Jelly Kats on the upstairs back bedroom window sill.  They were looking out for him coming home!  If he came in the back way, he might see them... and I hoped he would know I'd been watching out for him.

I went to bed leaving the Jelly Kats on duty.

I wasn't sure if he would spot them in the dark… they're not exactly big rabbits, about 10" tall.

The next morning, I woke up to a text saying "How lucky am I to have five rabbits waiting at the window for me to get home safely…" This is the most heart-warming text for me and to know that he doesn't feel "Too Big" to say this.

Awwww I'm so happy that he isn't Too BIG for this stuff… (big emosh sigh of contentment).

THEN….

This morning I came down to find THIS Scene (see photo below) outside my consulting room door... my heart was in my mouth!

For a few days he's had a terrible chesty cough and asthma worries… something that scared him throughout his younger years.  ...Me too, whilst being brave for him!

So I knew... something was up...

He's been feeling anxious about his chestiness and cough.  I'd heard him coughing and coughing and coughing before bed and he insisted he was fine and didn't need anything... he hates to be a burden :- (  and I do my best not to fuss...

It had been quite something the day before to hear him say: "I'm going to the docs Kas, I need anti biots and an inhaler for my chest"...  The boy who never goes to the doctor.. AND he drove himself there in his car, and went to collect his prescription - all the things I would have done previously.  It's a great sign, I know...

I often think of him as a little boy and get a surprise when I this 6 foot, bearded, deep voiced, car driving young man, who is built like a small mountain with incredible strength and resilience strides into the kitchen asking how I am.

AND he still lets me know… 
even though he is an adult, he still let's me know if he is struggling and scared and we can be in it together... (just not sure who is the strongest of us any more!!!  He's pretty impressive!!!)

But, when I came downstairs and saw the scene (see photo above) I felt emotional and grateful and proud and lots of things that although he "Doesn't Talk About Stuff" he does really… through the communication we set up all those years ago!

Thanks for reading <3
love
Kas


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BUT I'm Scared!
 

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Saturday, 13 July 2024

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